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      10-27-2006, 11:40 AM   #67
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I have a quick question about that. Why would she drag me along? so I get tired of it and eventually break myself away from her? thats what she truly wants? wow, because if that is true, she is one mean girl. I don't think she is THAT evil..
No she's not evil, she's weak. She doesn't have the guts to just tell you goodbye because then she'll have to face up to knowing her actions hurt you. And right now she's in that elated "new love" stage with the other guy so she doesn't want to kill that buzz with the downer of seeing you cry. This is going to hurt, but when she's not around you she's not giving you a seconds thought.

I'm going to come across as a prick, but dude, especially from your new sig lines, you need to man the fuck up. Yeah, you invested a couple of years with this girl, great. It was a great ride while it lasted, remember the happy times but now it's time to start a new adventure. It will never be like it was. Quit dwelling. Quit pining. Even if you get back together, the relationship is going to be lopsided that it won't be the same. She'll know she can get away with the same thing again. And it'll happen again; it's like gravity. It's natural law. It's like the guy that cheats on his wife and she forgives him. He knows he got away with it once, chances are good he can get away with it again.

Now's the time where you get to do anything you want, without having to consult somebody else for their opinion. Now's the time you get to go out and meet all those other people you missed out on meeting while you were in a relationship.

Go out and have fun, life's short.
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      10-27-2006, 11:46 AM   #68
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Damn. Well said...
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      10-27-2006, 12:12 PM   #69
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Lux- I know exactly where you are right now. I've been thru this a few times before. It's hard to listen to others when they tell you to move on when you just want to stay put. As of now you cant even imagine what "moving on" is because you're not able to see clearly.

As for the phone convo, I know that it made you feel good. It made you feel like nothing's changed. It seems like you guys are talking just like you used to. It also gives you the feeling that she still cares and the hope that she might come back to you. I can tell you right now that you're gonna get used to this. Then one day she's gonna do/say something and you will realize once again that she's not your gf anymore. You should just start getting used to that fact or it will hit you like a brick.

I know that even though many of us think that she's f'ck'd up for what she did to you, in your heart she's still everything. It will be hard for the next few months as you're learning how to deal with all of this. Who ever said break-ups are easy doesnt know what they're talking about. The truth is that all we can do is be here for you and give you advice. All we can do is build the stairs. It's up to you to decide whether or not to climb it to a better tomorrow...
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      10-27-2006, 12:21 PM   #70
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i dont care if anyone will hate me after this so here goes..sean after reading all your sorry ass posts, i have to say you're a f-in idiot and i'm glad that she dumped you. how can you love anyone when you cant even love yourself? if u love yourself, move on with ur friggin life. and if u really love her, let her be happy with the man she wants. hurting yourself wont make her go back to you; you're only holding her back. she pities you but she's not gonna be there anymore to pick u up when u fall
love hurts but life has to go on. if you decide to waste your life away, i suggest you kill yourself. dont bring the poor girl down with you coz she's the smart and tough one and you're definitely not
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      10-27-2006, 12:24 PM   #71
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Originally Posted by aapriadi
i dont care if anyone will hate me after this so here goes..sean after reading all your sorry ass posts, i have to say you're a f-in idiot and i'm glad that she dumped you. how can you love anyone when you cant even love yourself? if u love yourself, move on with ur friggin life. and if u really love her, let her be with the man she wants. hurting yourself wont make her go back to you; you're only holding her back.
love hurts but life has to go on. if you decide to waste your life away, i suggest you kill yourself. dont bring the poor girl down with you coz she's the smart and tough one and you're definitely not

It's good that you're giving him tough love but it's not the time. He's going thru a very tough time right now. After that long of a relationship, it's just hard to get ur life back on track.
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      10-27-2006, 12:33 PM   #72
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lol i thought it was worth the try
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      10-27-2006, 01:37 PM   #73
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If I were you I would go on a vacation for a few days.

Visit some friends that are out of town, or go somewhere that you can't be reached and are away from cell phones and a CPU.

Like maybe go on a 4 or 5 day cruise or something like that.

Change of scene will do wonders.
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      10-27-2006, 04:33 PM   #74
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If you are her best, she won't find any secondary, or she won't put you as secondary. It goes both way. Learn the mistake and don't make it again for next one.
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      10-27-2006, 04:49 PM   #75
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hey lux....read this....u'll see that i went through the same crap..felt the same way....and was given the same advice

http://www.e90post.com/forums/showthread.php?t=21577
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      10-27-2006, 05:02 PM   #76
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Originally Posted by MrSilver
Change of scene will do wonders.
Agreed. Buddy, you teach people how to treat you. After 4+ years together it's hard to imagine life apart so you're holding on to what you had come hell or high water - and in so doing you're telling her that it's okay to treat you like dogsh!t. She may not be doing it on purpose, but it's happening and you're letting it happen.

When you love somebody you don't do something to them that you know is hurting them. She's past the innocence phase; she's aware she's hurting you but she's still doing it. She's using your acquiescence as a blank cheque because you're the one who signed the cheque and gave it to her.

Take Silver's advice and remove yourself from the situation. Get some perspective.
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      10-29-2006, 10:11 PM   #77
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Originally Posted by lux.sh
I can feel ya on that one.



I get out, and every place seems like I've been with her. Im trying to go to places that doesn't remind me of her.



No matter what people say(my friends told me the same thing), she is still not a crap to me. Did she lie to me? Yes. Did she meet another guy? Yes. Did she betray me? Yes. Is she avoiding me? Yes. Is she having fun while Im sad as hell? Yes. Do I have plenty of reasons, more than enough reason to just get plain mad, madness that is so big that you can just forget about her? Yes.

Whats funny? She called me yesterday night and we had a brief conversation. Nothing big, just casual talk like "what did you do today?". We hung up after like few minutes. Really, it was nothing at all. but that little "normal" conversation that we haven't had for a week made me go to sleep. I finally got to sleep for more than 6 hours for the first time in days. Then she went out again with her "friends" today, but oh well. Its pathetic, I know. Everyone around me tells me im being stupid, there are plenty girls out there, blah blah.

Bottom line, she already stepped on me, drained my little bottle of pride out to the river, laughed her ass off about me to other friends, but I still want to stand by her side until she tells me to jump over the cliff. Thats when I will jump. I will get myself ready though. Im not a moron. Moron for love, yes, but not as a person.
I really appreciate your comment. All of you guys are helping me foresee whats coming ahead of me.

oh and about the car, good choice.
just imagine this... she's blowing some dude, later on this dude will bang her good, then PIITB, then he will cum all over her.... after that she calls you to chat for few minutes, and you all happy and sh!t that she called (do you see how pathetic this is?)... will you still stand by her side?
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