Best/Funniest Facebook status thread

BrokenVert · 04-20-2011, 02:39 AM

I'm really scared of elevators. Everytime I get in one I'm afraid that the doors will open onto a zombie apocalypse

If you watch jaws backwards it's about a shark that throws up until they have to open a beach

evotwelve · 04-20-2011, 02:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CollinsE90

"Today I realized if you watch Cinderella backwards, it's about a women who learns her place"

thanks collins, just use this one, see how many girls get mad.

BTM · 04-20-2011, 08:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ghosthi32

no worries i give him shit on there too

BTM · 04-20-2011, 08:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CollinsE90

do you really have to hate everything

See, you've got the wrong attitude. I don't hate "facebook," I like "not facebook"

Wakka · 04-20-2011, 10:00 AM

Brian, you really dont like anything. Lets be serious now.

KingOfJericho · 04-20-2011, 10:02 AM

Caption for this was "Beauty products sales rep or porn star?"

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BTM · 04-20-2011, 10:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wakka

Brian, you really dont like anything. Lets be serious now.

I love lamp

donsgolf2012 · 04-20-2011, 10:09 AM

Procrastination is like masterbation, feels good in the beginning, but in the end you f*** yourself.

Wakka · 04-20-2011, 10:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BTM

I love lamp

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

CollinsE90 · 04-20-2011, 11:31 AM

Looks like me and blake have some haters, that are to afraid to even insult with their name beside it. Its one thing to be a bitch IRL, but it takes a real bitch to hide on the internet

BTM · 04-20-2011, 11:33 AM

I made BTM hates everything and Mr OT = worst poster

Wakka · 04-20-2011, 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CollinsE90

Looks like me and blake have some haters, that are to afraid to even insult with their name beside it. Its one thing to be a bitch IRL, but it takes a real bitch to hide on the internet

have you ever seen any of the tags about me? C'mon your 'shit talkers' dont have anything on mine.

CollinsE90 · 04-20-2011, 11:39 AM

I figured one was one of you guys, but the other 2 I have a feeling who it is. Both were made at the same time, at the same time a certain person posted in this thread. Have no idea who the blake one would be

TK-421 · 04-20-2011, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CollinsE90

I figured one was one of you guys, but the other 2 I have a feeling who it is. Both were made at the same time, at the same time a certain person posted in this thread. Have no idea who the blake one would be

It's me, IIRC

Tondtar · 04-20-2011, 12:33 PM

Fresh from today's Newsfeed :

"Happy 420 Day peeps

...(Mom, please don't read this one!!)"

JayKay335i · 04-20-2011, 12:54 PM

I have to poop

NYCGP · 04-20-2011, 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JayKay335i

I have to poop

Me too. But the last few farts have included some burning... I think I better try to hold this one off..

JayKay335i · 04-20-2011, 12:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NYCGP

Me too. But the last few farts have included some burning... I think I better try to hold this one off..

Hmmm. I pooped before class. My ass has been burning lately. I accidentally bought "economy" cottonelle. WTF? I thought there shit only came in fluffy and super fluffy varietals.

CollinsE90 · 04-20-2011, 01:04 PM

Hey you fucks, derail other threads

NYCGP · 04-20-2011, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CollinsE90

Hey you fucks, derail other threads

Blake · 04-20-2011, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CollinsE90

Looks like me and blake have some haters, that are to afraid to even insult with their name beside it. Its one thing to be a bitch IRL, but it takes a real bitch to hide on the internet

meh it is what it is. i'm not even in this thread, but whatever. i could care less what some zit-faced basement dweller thinks about me in some worthless tag. at least they got the cocky part right.

NBRider88 · 04-20-2011, 01:12 PM

"I ordered a new Tiger video last week called “Tiger's favorite 18 holes”, When I put the damn thing in the DVD player, it was about golf"

"decided to burn a lot of calories today, so I set a fat kid on fire"

"yay, I got into collage"

"is proud of herself. she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years "

"she explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! when satisfied, she left! damn mosquito "

04-20-2011, 02:39 AM	#23
BrokenVert Resident Kerbalnaut 487 Rep 10,703 Posts Drives: Topless Brute/Hybrid Boogaloo Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Fahrvergnügen/NY iTrader: (0)	I'm really scared of elevators. Everytime I get in one I'm afraid that the doors will open onto a zombie apocalypse If you watch jaws backwards it's about a shark that throws up until they have to open a beach __________________
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04-20-2011, 10:02 AM	#28
KingOfJericho Major General 2458 Rep 7,341 Posts Drives: Yes Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: CT iTrader: (1) Garage List 2010 135i Coupe [5.26]	Caption for this was "Beauty products sales rep or porn star?" __________________ The views and opinions expressed in this post are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Bimmerpost. 2018 Jeep Grand Cherokee High Altitude Hemi \| 2010 S4 Sold \| 2010 BMW 135i Retired \| 2006 Lotus Exige Sold
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04-20-2011, 10:09 AM	#30
donsgolf2012 First Lieutenant 22 Rep 382 Posts Drives: 2007 BMW 335i Coupe Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: San Diego iTrader: (0) Garage List 2007 335i [0.00]	Procrastination is like masterbation, feels good in the beginning, but in the end you f*** yourself.
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04-20-2011, 11:31 AM	#32
CollinsE90 Where my bitches 795 Rep 1,924 Posts Drives: Cadillac coupe deville Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: street corner checking profits iTrader: (0)	Looks like me and blake have some haters, that are to afraid to even insult with their name beside it. Its one thing to be a bitch IRL, but it takes a real bitch to hide on the internet __________________
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04-20-2011, 11:33 AM	#33
BTM Banned 501 Rep 10,309 Posts Drives: A///MERICAN!!! Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: A///MERICA!!! iTrader: (11) Garage List 2007 BMW Z4 M Coupe [7.20]	I made BTM hates everything and Mr OT = worst poster
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04-20-2011, 11:39 AM	#35
CollinsE90 Where my bitches 795 Rep 1,924 Posts Drives: Cadillac coupe deville Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: street corner checking profits iTrader: (0)	I figured one was one of you guys, but the other 2 I have a feeling who it is. Both were made at the same time, at the same time a certain person posted in this thread. Have no idea who the blake one would be __________________
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04-20-2011, 12:33 PM	#37
Tondtar 12 yr old Juvie 1145 Rep 881 Posts Drives: His Mom Crazy Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: El Lay iTrader: (2) Garage List 2008 (RIP in 2011) ... [0.00]	Fresh from today's Newsfeed : "Happy 420 Day peeps ...(Mom, please don't read this one!!)"
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04-20-2011, 12:54 PM	#38
JayKay335i Banned 198 Rep 5,046 Posts Drives: ///M323 DCT Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: North Dakota; its best DUHHHHHH iTrader: (1)	I have to poop
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04-20-2011, 01:04 PM	#41
CollinsE90 Where my bitches 795 Rep 1,924 Posts Drives: Cadillac coupe deville Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: street corner checking profits iTrader: (0)	Hey you fucks, derail other threads __________________
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04-20-2011, 01:12 PM	#44
NBRider88 I gave her my heart, she gave me crabs 20 Rep 143 Posts Drives: 06' 330i Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: OC :] iTrader: (2)	"I ordered a new Tiger video last week called “Tiger's favorite 18 holes”, When I put the damn thing in the DVD player, it was about golf" "decided to burn a lot of calories today, so I set a fat kid on fire" "yay, I got into collage" "is proud of herself. she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years " "she explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! when satisfied, she left! damn mosquito " Last edited by NBRider88; 04-20-2011 at 01:17 PM..
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