BMW
X1 / X2
forum
BMW Garage BMW Meets Register Today's Posts
BIMMERPOST Universal Forums Off-Topic Discussions Board Office Dares

Post Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
      08-16-2006, 03:26 PM   #1
nmulax
Brigadier General
nmulax's Avatar
United_States
394
Rep
4,320
Posts

Drives: '07 Z4 M Coupe
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Metro-Detroit

iTrader: (5)

Garage List
2007 Z4M Coupé  [7.66]
Office Dares

ONE-POINT OFFICE DARES

1) Run one lap around the office at top speed.


2) Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.


3) Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say, "Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."

4) To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.


5) Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say,
"Sorry, I really prefer it this way."


6) Walk sideways to the photocopier.


7) While riding in an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the doors
open.


THREE-POINT DARES

1) Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barreled fingers.


2) Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask, "Did you get all
that, I don't want to have to repeat it."


3) Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).


4) Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle
(there must be a 'non-player' within sight).


5) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.


FIVE POINT DARES

1) At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to
conclude with the singing of the national anthem (5 extra points if you
actually launch into it yourself).


2) Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.


3) For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob."


4) Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two."


5) After every sentence, say 'Mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent. As
in "The report's on your desk, Mon." Keep this up for 1 hour.


6) While an office mate is out, move their chair into the elevator.


7) In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, all of you just shut up!"


8) At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, "As God as my witness, I'll never go hungry again."


9) In a colleague's DAY PLANNER, write in the 10am slot: "See how I look in tights."(5 Extra points if it is a male, 5 more if he is your boss)


10) Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask, "You wanna
trade?"


11) Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."


12) Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it."


13) Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a
lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.


14) Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very important conference call.


15) Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.


16) Hang a 2' long piece of toilet roll from the back of your pants and
act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.


17) Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuits,
smashing each biscuit with your fist.


18) During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.


19) Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee, move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.


And if that wasn't enough for you... How to keep a healthy level of
insanity:



1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a
hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.


2) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."


3) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.


4) Put your waste basket on your desk and label it "IN".


5) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.


6) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."


7) Don't use any punctuation


8) Use, too...much; punctuation!


9) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.


10) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.


11) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."


12) Sing along at the opera.


13) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.


14) Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.


15) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party
because you're not in the mood.


16) Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, "Rock Hard."


17) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!!!"


18) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
__________________
Appreciate 0
      08-16-2006, 03:58 PM   #2
just4kickz
boku no namae ha...
United_States
344
Rep
11,023
Posts

Drives: 2006 BS 330i
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: S. Bay Area, CA + Newark, NJ + ChiCity + True Blue

iTrader: (11)

Garage List
2006 E90 330i  [0.00]
Lol Good Post! made my day
__________________
looking for a PreLCI Black Sapphire e90 front bumper without license plate holes

"Akimbo shotguns. Broken wrists anyone? And don't give me that 'it's just a game' bull****. Where the **** are my akimbo interventions then?! One scope on each eye mother****er!!"
Appreciate 0
      08-16-2006, 04:06 PM   #3
18LLC
Major General
156
Rep
5,104
Posts

Drives: e89
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: California

iTrader: (0)

HAA HAA HAA! I love it. I marked off a few I’ve done.





ONE-POINT OFFICE DARES

1) Run one lap around the office at top speed.-Did it while playing football


2) Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.-Do we have 5 people?


3) Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say, "Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."-Done it to Aloma when she’s grouchy

4) To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.


5) Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say,
"Sorry, I really prefer it this way."


6) Walk sideways to the photocopier.


7) While riding in an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the doors
open.


THREE-POINT DARES

1) Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barreled fingers.-Done it a couple of times


2) Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask, "Did you get all
that, I don't want to have to repeat it."-Did it


3) Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).-back with the old phones, did it.


4) Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle
(there must be a 'non-player' within sight).


5) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.-do it frequently


FIVE POINT DARES

1) At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to
conclude with the singing of the national anthem (5 extra points if you
actually launch into it yourself).


2) Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.-GREAT IDEA! Can’t wait for Boaz to get back!


3) For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob."


4) Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two."


5) After every sentence, say 'Mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent. As
in "The report's on your desk, Mon." Keep this up for 1 hour.


6) While an office mate is out, move their chair into the elevator.-In college moved the entire bathroom stall (toilet, door and mirror) into the elevator.


7) In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, all of you just shut up!"


8) At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, "As God as my witness, I'll never go hungry again."


9) In a colleague's DAY PLANNER, write in the 10am slot: "See how I look in tights."(5 Extra points if it is a male, 5 more if he is your boss)-Does Boaz have a Day Planner? If so, I’m all over it!


10) Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask, "You wanna
trade?"


11) Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."


12) Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it."


13) Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a
lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.


14) Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very important conference call.-done it


15) Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.


16) Hang a 2' long piece of toilet roll from the back of your pants and
act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.


17) Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuits,
smashing each biscuit with your fist.


18) During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.-Done it


19) Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee, move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.


And if that wasn't enough for you... How to keep a healthy level of
insanity:


1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a
hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.


2) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."


3) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.


4) Put your waste basket on your desk and label it "IN".


5) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.


6) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."


7) Don't use any punctuation-Should do it


8) Use, too...much; punctuation!-Done it


9) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.-Intern used to do that all the time!


10) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.


11) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."-Done it


12) Sing along at the opera.


13) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.


14) Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.


15) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party
because you're not in the mood.


16) Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, "Rock Hard."


17) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!!!"


18) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
__________________
Appreciate 0
      08-16-2006, 04:29 PM   #4
Victor.L3IchibanM3
Banned
United_States
284
Rep
373
Posts

Drives: '06 325i,'04 RX 330,'99Corolla
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: San Jose

iTrader: (0)

I might get my ass fire
Appreciate 0
      08-16-2006, 04:40 PM   #5
Gitta
Kelly's 330i
Gitta's Avatar
United_States
13
Rep
413
Posts

Drives: 330i
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: E PA

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
A few years ago when my boss went on vacation I put a sign on his door that had all sorts of details about a party in his office (while he was away). I filled his office with a portable grille, about 40-50 empty beer cans and a few empty bottles of booze. How many points for that?
__________________
'06 330ix | 6MT | TS-BDL-BW | ZSP | ZPP | heated seats |... mods | cf splitters painted TiAg | spoiler | blacklines | short shift knob | cf trim |
*** winter setup: 17" ASA JH3 & Dunlop WinterSport M3 DSST ***
.
'01 325xi | auto | TS-GDL-BW | ZPP | heated seats |........... mods | spoiler | mudguards | blackout grills | clear lights | halo projector headlights |
Appreciate 0
      08-16-2006, 05:35 PM   #6
18LLC
Major General
156
Rep
5,104
Posts

Drives: e89
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: California

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gitta
A few years ago when my boss went on vacation I put a sign on his door that had all sorts of details about a party in his office (while he was away). I filled his office with a portable grille, about 40-50 empty beer cans and a few empty bottles of booze. How many points for that?
0, because he is not in the office.
j/k
__________________
Appreciate 0
      08-16-2006, 05:43 PM   #7
shimshimhada
Brigadier General
shimshimhada's Avatar
United_States
493
Rep
4,838
Posts

Drives: Portal
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Portal

iTrader: (2)

At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a
hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

Appreciate 0
      08-16-2006, 05:49 PM   #8
just4kickz
boku no namae ha...
United_States
344
Rep
11,023
Posts

Drives: 2006 BS 330i
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: S. Bay Area, CA + Newark, NJ + ChiCity + True Blue

iTrader: (11)

Garage List
2006 E90 330i  [0.00]
Quote:
Originally Posted by shimshimhada
At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a
hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

LOL!
__________________
looking for a PreLCI Black Sapphire e90 front bumper without license plate holes

"Akimbo shotguns. Broken wrists anyone? And don't give me that 'it's just a game' bull****. Where the **** are my akimbo interventions then?! One scope on each eye mother****er!!"
Appreciate 0
      08-17-2006, 04:41 AM   #9
NFS
Major General
NFS's Avatar
292
Rep
9,218
Posts

Drives: G80 M3
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: UK

iTrader: (0)

Just spent the last 2 minutes laughing - very good
Appreciate 0
Post Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:03 AM.




u11
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
1Addicts.com, BIMMERPOST.com, E90Post.com, F30Post.com, M3Post.com, ZPost.com, 5Post.com, 6Post.com, 7Post.com, XBimmers.com logo and trademark are properties of BIMMERPOST