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      03-30-2015, 09:54 AM   #573
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      03-30-2015, 10:52 AM   #574
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Had a baby "sprinkle" for my wife this past weekend and according to all who attended, our daughter was the life of the party!

It's impossible to explain to a non-parent, but when you're laying on the couch watching TV and your kid climbs up and snuggles up next to you... it just melts your heart. Nothing like it in the world.
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      03-30-2015, 11:20 AM   #575
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I agree on the post above.

It is hard to understand that feeling, a warm heartwarming feeling when you have moments with your son or daughter.

Having a kid is not for everyone, and basing from the demographic of most forum users and what they do in real life, I can see that there are a lot of objections on having kids.

It is not for everyone
It is a big responsibility
Commitment is lifetime
Less time watching TV or other hobby
Challenges

I just think a lot of people give up after the thought because they cannot handle responsibility and see their environment as not being "fit" to have offsprings
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      03-30-2015, 01:04 PM   #576
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KingOfJericho View Post
It's impossible to explain to a non-parent, but when you're laying on the couch watching TV and your kid climbs up and snuggles up next to you... it just melts your heart. Nothing like it in the world.
+a million. Just that short moment makes everything else in life insignificant.
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      03-30-2015, 01:14 PM   #577
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+a million. Just that short moment makes everything else in life insignificant.
like taking a puff of that good shyt?
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      03-30-2015, 02:34 PM   #578
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As part of a child-free couple myself, I have to say it is refreshing/encouraging to read many of the responses here from parents who do admit that it is not for everyone.

When I was young and foolish I used to think that it was pretty self evident that there is no single path to happiness, and that what is absolutely right for one person could be the worst possible choice for another.

Yet, I've met a disturbing number of parents who dont subscribe to that, and since having kids was good for them, they think you are somehow deficient or making a gigantic mistake by having different life choices. They simply refuse to try and fathom the concept that something is "not for everyone", and some of them are even surprisingly quite militant about it.

Nice to see that some people do get it; that not having kids makes me as happy as having kids makes you, and that's OK !
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      03-30-2015, 03:23 PM   #579
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I really should reach out to my 20 children and see how they're doing.
Only 20?!?

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      03-30-2015, 04:50 PM   #580
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^funny until the responsibility part
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      03-30-2015, 05:01 PM   #581
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Originally Posted by MiddleAgedAl View Post
As part of a child-free couple myself, I have to say it is refreshing/encouraging to read many of the responses here from parents who do admit that it is not for everyone.

When I was young and foolish I used to think that it was pretty self evident that there is no single path to happiness, and that what is absolutely right for one person could be the worst possible choice for another.

Yet, I've met a disturbing number of parents who dont subscribe to that, and since having kids was good for them, they think you are somehow deficient or making a gigantic mistake by having different life choices. They simply refuse to try and fathom the concept that something is "not for everyone", and some of them are even surprisingly quite militant about it.

Nice to see that some people do get it; that not having kids makes me as happy as having kids makes you, and that's OK !
Stop kidding yourself Al. You will never know the kind of love that parents know. It's incomprehensible for those who don't have kids. You might think you're happy, but you won't know true happiness until you have a child of your own. Actually, until your child does something so cute it just turns your heart to goo.
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      03-30-2015, 05:12 PM   #582
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Originally Posted by Mr Tonka View Post
Stop kidding yourself Al. You will never know the kind of love that parents know. It's incomprehensible for those who don't have kids. You might think you're happy, but you won't know true happiness until you have a child of your own. Actually, until your child does something so cute it just turns your heart to goo.
This is a real thing. I have this annoying but super cute little white cat. He shits and pisses all over the place, disturbs me when I'm trying to do ANYTHING, needs so much attention - needs you to walk around with him and watch him eat. I'm starting to attribute this to his balls still being intact (not neutered) but I don't have the heart to de-ball him.
We used to live in place with a big roof where our old cat could go roam and it seems like they really do need something to do, although I'm not sure if that's a good idea with a intact male cat. We live in an apartment now with no place for him to go so his daily routine is to cause excrement armaggedon to show his displeasure.

BUT, when I get pissed and grab him and want to stranger him to death, he makes this cute double eye blink looking into my eyes innocently like "I did not nothing wrong, human. I know you find me too irresistibly cute to do anything to me, so you must obey human."

No idea, but I think it's worst with HUMAN kids.
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      03-30-2015, 05:15 PM   #583
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My kids do my fuckin tits in but I wouldn't change anything for a moment. Mind you, anyone that tells how the first year or so is fun are talking utter SHITE!!!
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      03-30-2015, 05:40 PM   #584
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr Tonka View Post
Stop kidding yourself Al. You will never know the kind of love that parents know. It's incomprehensible for those who don't have kids. You might think you're happy, but you won't know true happiness until you have a child of your own. Actually, until your child does something so cute it just turns your heart to goo.
Sarcasm aside, I've never been skydiving but I've heard the feeling is amazing. I can imagine what it feels like but the feeling of taking that step out of the plane is beyond all description. Am I a shitty person for not having the desire to do so? Absolutely not - but those who have felt it may feel as though those who haven't are missing out on one of the greatest feelings in life. In reality, I'm still a perfectly happy person who feels completely fulfilled without having taken that leap. That's how some of us feel about having kids vs those without the desire. It's not a knock on those without kids, but it's definitely something dinks factually haven't experienced, in the most literal sense.
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      03-30-2015, 05:44 PM   #585
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bigfra View Post
Mind you, anyone that tells how the first year or so is fun are talking utter SHITE!!!
This. The first year is like tackling a loose firehose.

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      03-30-2015, 06:26 PM   #586
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr Tonka View Post
Stop kidding yourself Al. You will never know the kind of love that parents know. It's incomprehensible for those who don't have kids. You might think you're happy, but you won't know true happiness until you have a child of your own. Actually, until your child does something so cute it just turns your heart to goo.


This makes me very sad. To try and deal with the sorrow, I think my wife and I are going to have to grab one of those cheap last minute deals again and fly to Vegas this weekend, because, you know, we can do that.

In the day, I'll go wring the neck of a 458 Italia at Las Vegas Motor Speedway with Exotics Racing (got a discount coupon from the last time I went) while the Mrs amuses herself at the Forum Shops, then hit the SW Steakhouse at the Wynn for dinner, and catch a show at night.

It's clearly no substitute for having our own screaming bundle of poop machine, but we're quite self-involved and shallow, so that trip will really help us get over it.
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      03-30-2015, 07:22 PM   #587
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The post above reminds me of my old boss, dos not have kids and he is the most self centred narcissist and socially awkward person I have met

Seems that the world revolved around him and probable cause is not experiencing dealing with kids, responsibility and what not

He acts like a teenager that never matured up in life. He is 55 years old
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      03-30-2015, 07:33 PM   #588
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MiddleAgedAl View Post


This makes me very sad. To try and deal with the sorrow, I think my wife and I are going to have to grab one of those cheap last minute deals again and fly to Vegas this weekend, because, you know, we can do that.

In the day, I'll go wring the neck of a 458 Italia at Las Vegas Motor Speedway with Exotics Racing (got a discount coupon from the last time I went) while the Mrs amuses herself at the Forum Shops, then hit the SW Steakhouse at the Wynn for dinner, and catch a show at night.

It's clearly no substitute for having our own screaming bundle of poop machine, but we're quite self-involved and shallow, so that trip will really help us get over it.
Jelly!
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      03-30-2015, 07:56 PM   #589
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MiddleAgedAl View Post


This makes me very sad. To try and deal with the sorrow, I think my wife and I are going to have to grab one of those cheap last minute deals again and fly to Vegas this weekend, because, you know, we can do that.

In the day, I'll go wring the neck of a 458 Italia at Las Vegas Motor Speedway with Exotics Racing (got a discount coupon from the last time I went) while the Mrs amuses herself at the Forum Shops, then hit the SW Steakhouse at the Wynn for dinner, and catch a show at night.

It's clearly no substitute for having our own screaming bundle of poop machine, but we're quite self-involved and shallow, so that trip will really help us get over it.
I want to be like this guy when my kids grow up.
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      03-30-2015, 10:43 PM   #590
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I am not a parent and I am indifferent at this time. I do not know what it means to be a parent except that sacrifice is inevitable.

My opinion is that people are selfish with children, and I mean a good majority. Out of the majority of couples I know, there is only a small minority that are good parents. The rest just had kids because "that's what you do at X age." This means people did something out of obligation rather than desire/passion.

My point: Society disgusts me. Thanks for listening! ☺
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      03-30-2015, 11:46 PM   #591
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Originally Posted by Mr Tonka View Post
Can you explain this statement in more depth?
I didn't quite get the statement myself (then again my grammar isn't perfect either), but what what I think he meant to say is that your spending habits are no longer dictated by yourself, but rather the needs of the child such as having a mouth to feed, daycare, and especially college... Which I agree, is one of the things I'm almost afraid of when my future kids grow up [if I have any])... Where I either pray that 1. The college bubble bursts like the .com fiasco and college becomes affordable again in the aftermath, 2. they inherit my entrepreneurial spirit and be the next college-less success story like Gates, Oprah or Steve Jobs (but I pray they do a better job than I did) or 3. I suppose we gotta move to Germany or another country where college is free for everyone.

Feel free to correct me though.
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      03-31-2015, 08:22 AM   #592
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr Tonka View Post
Stop kidding yourself Al. You will never know the kind of love that parents know. It's incomprehensible for those who don't have kids. You might think you're happy, but you won't know true happiness until you have a child of your own. Actually, until your child does something so cute it just turns your heart to goo.
I think this is the kind sentiment that people get turned off by. I get turned off by it. Happiness ("true" or not, whatever that means) is completely subjective. There is not a single criterion that defines happiness at an objective level.

To negate someone else's happiness because you think your happiness is better than theirs since you chose to make some sort of decision that another chooses to not make, is exactly the kind of arrogance that brings these discussions and groups of people to polarized viewpoints and degeneration.

The same argument has been used countless times; married vs. single, faith vs. non-religious, kids vs. no kids, etc. And all it does is rip people apart.

Listen, I believe anyone can absolutely know, live, and experience "true happiness" and that it depends on absolutely nothing that any outside person will suggest. It is completely internal and subjective.

Just because I chose to have kids or not have kids, doesn't make my happiness any better than anyone else's.

/rant

( For the record, I do have 2 children, a fact which makes me no better than anyone who chooses not to have children. )
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      03-31-2015, 08:27 AM   #593
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I think this is the kind sentiment that people get turned off by. I get turned off by it. I think it's a load of shit. Happiness ("true" or not, whatever that means) is completely subjective. There is not a single criterion that defines happiness at an objective level.

To shit on someone else's happiness because you think your happiness is better than theirs since you chose to make some sort of decision that another chooses to not make, is exactly the kind of arrogance that brings these discussions and groups of people to polarized viewpoints and degeneration.

The same argument has been used countless times; married vs. single, faith vs. non-religious, kids vs. no kids, etc. And all it does is rip people apart.

Listen, I believe anyone can absolutely know, live, and experience "true happiness" and that it depends on absolutely nothing that any outside person will suggest. It is completely internal and subjective.

Just because I chose to have kids or not have kids, doesn't make my happiness any better than anyone else's.

/rant

( For the record, I do have 2 children, a fact which makes me no better than anyone who chooses not to have children. )
Very well said. True happiness is only in the beholder, because everyone has their own sense of what true happiness is, children or not. Some people are happy being millionaires and spending copious amounts of money, while some people are happy being millionaires but never spend a dime. Always two ends of the spectrum.
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      03-31-2015, 09:04 AM   #594
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Who ever said that people who choose not to have kids are not happy??
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