[nazali]

If you can't do the time, don't do the crime ?

No one is ever forced into getting married, maybe it is expected, maybe we are drawn to have a lifelong mate.

I know a couple who the husband hasn't had sex or any kind of intimacy for nigh on 10 years and counting. That is one very rough relationship, married with 1 kid.

I think there are times in both men and women's lives that sex can and does stop, but it should be an understanding that it is temporary and other aspects of the relationship, such as intimacy doesn't stop.

Men who suffer from ED are in the same and probably worse boat that a woman with PMS, both bring up barriers in intimacy. SEX and inimacy are 2 different things, you can stop sex in a marriage with no major issues as long as the intimacy doesn't.

Also part of being in a marriage you are supposed to sacrifice and understand that whilst you may not need sex or intimacy and your partner may wait a while, you should discuss what you can both have or do.

"Not too night" is always fine, "wait till next month" may be on the edge but "wait till christmas" is a big NO

Any partner who does not look after there partners sexual needs, "UNLESS" there are physical pain or hinderances, OR offer alternatives is just asking for trouble.

I said it jokingly, but ther are plenty of bitches and bastards out there looking and more than happy to take care of your man or lady. If that happens then you have ONLY your self to blame.

there are 2 bible quotes

"The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband... Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control" (1 Cor 7:3, 5).

"The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife" (1 Cor 7:4).

Even Jesus knew that if you deny your partner for long enough that is NOT a good thing

Originally Posted by c1pher

Many men also deal with post menopausal wives while their libido is still strong. No one seems to talk about that though and expect men to become celibate. If you decide to have extra marital sex, you’re the devil. Married for better or worse, correct?

[nazali]

A man leaving the house with blue balls is an invitation to trouble,
A man leaving a house with his nut sack well and truly empty, is coming back for more

[nazali]

A friend of mine once told me what he looked for for a potential partner

1> A Sandy Dee, he can take home to Mom
2> Cooks Like Martha Stewart
3> Mothers him like Marion Ross (happy days mom)
4> And screws him in the bedroom like Mia Khalifa

if he couldnt have all 4 types he'd just settle for a little Mia

[floridaorange]

So detrimental for some, beneficial for others... like most things in life. I haven't looked at any in years, but back when I did, it was extremely captivating hyper-charged stuff that was very difficult to not think about. Which is the main reason I don't go near it anymore. Fortunately there is no need for it in my marriage of 13 yrs.

The reality is, it's free for anyone to access online, and the websites just want clicks, regardless of the age. An indication that there are no boundaries, for these private acts is not a good thing for our youth. And believe me, kids are accessing this stuff. I guess my remaining question is, why isn't there more intervention toward preventing the hardcore stuff from reaching todays kids and youth?

[Housekeeping]

Porn is hugely detrimental. Much of porn is derived from the sex slave industry. Those girls that look so happy and in to it are often times forced to be in those pics and videos. Those of you watching and looking only contribute to this problem by way of giving these sites ad dollars. This in a legal term make you culpable. I personally resist it as so not to contribute to this evil industry. Give it some thought. I’m also shocked, well, maybe I’m not, that no one has mentioned that it’s simply wrong, spelled out numerous times in the Bible as a sin. These two reasons give me enough reason to know it’s “detrimental”.

[jmack]

Religious and morale arguments aside, porn is primarily a tool to subdue men and weaken relationships between men and women. If it's free, you are the product.

[unluky]

What cracks me up is thinking of all these kids who grow up with it like it's normal - which I guess now it is. Like no looking at the JC Penny catalog and trying to guess what's under there when your 8-10? Like not seeing your first semi-nudie mag (playboy) when your older? Like not knowing exactly what all is going on down there and just feeling your way thru it?

Just straight to "can a horse penis fit into a human" and get 10 videos returned in .004 seconds when you are 7. I can't even imagine what my ideas of sex would have been had I had that at my disposal as a child.

[iminhell1]

Porn funds youtube racecars

[Tommy-G]

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/hkQ-AQpU_o8

(SAFE except for language)

I don't know, she looks pretty happy in that Bentley

[floridaorange]

Originally Posted by Tommy-G

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/hkQ-AQpU_o8

(SAFE except for language)

I don't know, she looks pretty happy in that Bentley

"The great trick the devil ever pulled was….."

(Ironically said by Kevin Spacey)

[rebekahb]

Originally Posted by c1pher

Many men also deal with post menopausal wives while their libido is still strong. No one seems to talk about that though and expect men to become celibate. If you decide to have extra marital sex, you're the devil. Married for better or worse, correct?

Do you think women enjoy going through menopause and having hormonal shifts and not wanting sex? Maybe some do if their husband has zero understanding and is a selfish dick. Why isn't the husband creating intimacy with his wife? There are other ways to go around those things. Maybe the wife is ashamed and embarrassed possibly coupled with a jerk husband who is so crass she can't even fathom having a conversation with him. Maybe she doesn't have money to go to the doctor for hormonal testing. The list of possibilities goes on.

There is a common theme in several of these posts about women and men can be as much to blame. The bigger question is why not work and try to find a new or acceptable ways for both parties to find pleasure. It's always the easy scapegoat of let me grab my computer or go out and find a side piece because I'm to selfish to put in actual work to a relationship. Because #itsallaboutmeandmynut

[rebekahb]

Originally Posted by Watching The World Burn

Interesting to get a woman's perspective on it - do you think its detrimental? Do you think it has a different effect depending on whether it is a guy vs girl watching it?

[COLOR="Blue"]I think it can be depending on the couple. Anything in excess isn't good for you. I don't think this is an easy question to answer. Is this wife agreeing because she doesn't want to disappoint her husband or she doesn't feel adequate? Does she secretly build resentment? Is the husband afraid to talk to his wife because he needs more? This leads to secrets and in some people shame. I know there are some couples who have a strong relationship and like weird shit and are ok with it. I have also seen said relationships eventually implode. [/COLOR]

[COLOR="Blue"]As far as guy vs girl watching it and having a different effect? I really don't know as this is all off the cuff thinking and no real structural evidence. I would lean to say the effect isn't any different. I think there could be some areas of this where if you drilled down to a more specific area (men watching kiddie porn vs women) than yeah it's more of an effect on men. I can't believe I even just typed that example[/COLOR].

I think it personally is detrimental. There's the dopamine hit that was mentioned previously, but I guess I'd also compare it partially (though not the same) to having sex with multiple partners instead of one. It is my hypothesis, though I don't know, that if you have multiple partners before marriage, that each one brings something different to the table that the other does not (sexually speaking) and vice versa. I think as a result of that, you inevitably wind up comparing the person you married to the others in some way and wishing they did *this*, whatever *this* was. Whereas, had you not had any sex before marriage, you wouldn't have a clue what you were "missing" so to speak. And there wouldn't be the same comparison, by extension, you are then happier.

I think porn basically brings that back in, not to the same degree of course because you aren't experiencing it physically / emotionally, but it creates these unhealthy comparisons which doesn't help your relationship.

This is partially why I'm an advocate for abstaining from sex before marriage, though I completely understand the temptation. To administer the coup de grace to this thread though, I'll have to say it is also because it is a Biblical command.

Also, so much is sexualized these days. Look at these kids today and the pics they post or filter. I'm by no means a prude but all of this lack of true reality is going to make for a even more screwed up society than we already have.

[Tommy-G]

Originally Posted by rebekahb;

Also, so much is sexualized these days. Look at these kids today and the pics they post or filter. I'm by no means a prude but all of this lack of true reality is going to make for a even more screwed up society than we already have.

You know, its crazy. My niece tells us that they have BJ parties at lunch time with kids from her school.
When I was 16-17, I never would have thought about sending someone nude'z. Now a day its probably 13-14 at the latest

[Watching The World Burn]

Originally Posted by Tommy-G

You know, its crazy. My niece tells us that they have BJ parties at lunch time with kids from her school.
When I was 16-17, I never would have thought about sending someone nude'z. Now a day its probably 13-14 at the latest

Seriously? Kind of hard for me to believe that, though I suppose maybe. This is high school I assume?

I don't know, just can't envision that. Though I have to say, if that is happening, that's probably going to have an effect on whether I send my sons to public high school...which I was initially going to do, but if that's mainstream, then maybe not. I think I'd have trouble believing this is common practice though. Guess I'm going to have to start seriously thinking about it in the next 3-4 years as to which way we go.

[HBC]

Originally Posted by Tommy-G

You know, its crazy. My niece tells us that they have BJ parties at lunch time with kids from her school.

What school is this? Asking for a friend.

[rebekahb]

It's interesting how I haven't had this conversation in who knows how long and this thread pops up and then this podcast pops up. I challenge people to listen to it and give me your thoughts. Here are my questions from it and those who watch porn I'm very curious on your response. I really would like a better understanding of how people process their thoughts on this.


1. There are people being trafficked in porn. While you don't buy it, you watching makes you a contributor to that person continuing to be trafficked. Is the thought process well they will continue to have it so why stop? If you are not ok with sex trafficking why are you watching an industry that supports this?

2. A girl was in Vegas. She was slipped drugs and raped. It was videoed. PornHub kept the video up for 3 years and this girls rape was monetized. She presses charges, wins the case and the images still exist on google because her face isn't easily identifiable and there is not clear coercion happening so google isn't going to take them down. What if this was your daughter? Would you still watch? This contributes to rape being on the internet. You might not be selecting this particular video but watching other videos on this same platform is supporting the parent entity. I did read they made some changes.

Start at 1:45 if you don't want to hear a Christian blurb. Joshua Broome goes over his time in the porn industry and apparently he was very successful but listen to how it degraded his soul. Obviously, this is one persons take and 30 people he knew died by suicide so maybe there are some out there that have no soul where it doesn't affect them.

Do any of these thoughts run through anyone else's mind or am I on an island of my own

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcas...=1000588385066

[Tommy-G]

Originally Posted by Watching The World Burn

Seriously? Kind of hard for me to believe that, though I suppose maybe. This is high school I assume?

I don't know, just can't envision that. Though I have to say, if that is happening, that's probably going to have an effect on whether I send my sons to public high school...which I was initially going to do, but if that's mainstream, then maybe not. I think I'd have trouble believing this is common practice though. Guess I'm going to have to start seriously thinking about it in the next 3-4 years as to which way we go.

Originally Posted by HBC

What school is this? Asking for a friend.

Suburbs outside Milwaukee, 6-8th grade kids

[c1pher]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

Do you think women enjoy going through menopause and having hormonal shifts and not wanting sex? Maybe some do if their husband has zero understanding and is a selfish dick. Why isn't the husband creating intimacy with his wife? There are other ways to go around those things. Maybe the wife is ashamed and embarrassed possibly coupled with a jerk husband who is so crass she can't even fathom having a conversation with him. Maybe she doesn't have money to go to the doctor for hormonal testing. The list of possibilities goes on.

There is a common theme in several of these posts about women and men can be as much to blame. The bigger question is why not work and try to find a new or acceptable ways for both parties to find pleasure. It's always the easy scapegoat of let me grab my computer or go out and find a side piece because I'm to selfish to put in actual work to a relationship. Because #itsallaboutmeandmynut

No one said women enjoy menopause. No one said there can’t be intimacy but realistically doesn’t address an imbalance in libido. No one blamed anyone. Just stating what happens many times. It obviously struck a chord. It’s a sensitive topic.

[iminhell1]

Originally Posted by Tommy-G

You know, its crazy. My niece tells us that they have BJ parties at lunch time with kids from her school.
When I was 16-17, I never would have thought about sending someone nude'z. Now a day its probably 13-14 at the latest

A HS aged girl I'd worked with few years ago had mentioned something about the local 4-H being just a bunch of sluts basically and that she didn't join because of that.
I didn't ask. I was confused enough.

I have no kids and it seems every time I talk with kids it's just the weirdest shit coming from them and they see it as totally normal behavior.



But about that Bentley ...
I'd park a Bentley in it.

[rebekahb]

Originally Posted by c1pher

No one said women enjoy menopause. No one said there can't be intimacy but realistically doesn't address an imbalance in libido. No one blamed anyone. Just stating what happens many times. It obviously struck a chord. It's a sensitive topic.

Haha, it didn't. I'm just throwing things out there for guys to think about. As a woman I can give my perspective of things I hear about. There wasn't any balance and I'm trying to throw a little out there. It's a complicated topic and no easy answer.

[AmuroRay]

Porn is one of the most destructive things we've attempted to normalize in society. Sexualizing everything and taking the intimacy out of act and people end up giving it away.

It's honestly gross and very "beta" and cuckish watching another man/woman have sex.

[ToddBlack88]

This