[SoYank]

Originally Posted by BellasBmw

You guys.. this is pretty sad but im homesick and i wanna go back to cali . I have only been here a week. Its not that i hate it, or anything. But i miss my mom and family. I thought i was going to love not hearing her yell at me or bitch.. but in reality its all i can think about. Im literally homesick, ive been having bad stomach aches and nervousness thinking about it. What should i do?? I spent all this money on supplies , traveling, a going away party, and ill look like a fool coming back so soon. But, i wanna see everyone. I should have gone to a school in cali that way i could drive home once a month. I didnt think it was gonna be this hard. I dont think ill last till christmas. I gotta home before then, but im in the class Mon-Fri.

.

Hang in there, girl! Moving 3000 miles away from home is inherently tough on the psych when you're young. But it's been only a week. Give it some time. You're young, never been away from home before, in a strange area, without your close friends you're familiar with. You'll adapt, make new friends, learn new things. Immerse yourself in your studies (to a point) and soon you'll find the homesickness fades almost as rapidly as the onset. I'd bet if your suitemates/roommate are from a fair distance away and young like you, they're a bit homesick, too right about now.

Best of luck. It's all a part of growing up.

[Richypc]

I gave you 2 full winters too. Seems homesickness is really weighing in on you though. You said you went to the city the within the first couple of days with your roomate, I was surprised you started going out that soon after arriving, but that is the key right there. You have to keep your mind off, from thinking about your family. I know it's really hard, you feel like you just want to cut-out-and-run back to cali.

Paying attention or staying focus must be very hard for you right now, your grades might suffer if you continue this way. I would at least stay until next fall semester and get a transfer back, to make it worthwhile. That way you can just convince yourself, "it's only a year", which will ease the pain. And then spend the rest of the time there trying to experience what you went there to do. Best of both worlds I think. Think of it as a year of school studying abroad.

Have you told your parents about coming back or how you are feeling? It would only make it worse, as Im sure they would try to convince you to come back as well. Mine did when I first told them, and the problem with that is it will get talked about a lot more, making it harder to forget. They will start to offer you incentives to come back too...lol

[magmd]

hang in there....it will get better.

[BellasBmw]

Thanks guys.

Well i have good and bad days. Its almost like a breakup. Sometimes i think "im fine. I dont need him/her. I can do this on my own." And other days, you wanna crawl back into their arms and never let go.

This morning was rough. Especially since im getting the run around here at school. Everytime i have to switch something around, i have to talk to 5 different people to get there. For example- I need an Eng 2 class in order to continue with my major. If i do not complete this class, basically next sem im screwed because its a prerequisite. However, the eng 2 classes are totally full. Well AFTER bullshit and running around i was able to get a tues and thurs 4:30-5:55pm class. Its a shitty ass time because i have like a 3 hr break inbtwn. But i guess i have to sacrifice.

Also, im enrolled in Italian 3. My advisor placed me in that class due to the fact that ive taken italian 1 and 2 at my CC in san diego. Well, today in class my teacher noticed that i was doing well and asked if i took the placement .I told her i wastn aware of a placement?? So i went to the lab took the test and scored high enough to be in Level 5. Well AFTERWARDS i find out that if you have college credits on a foreign language, you DONT take the test. So now the school wont give me credit for italian 3 since i placed well above it. Now i have to talk to the department head and hope they will eliminate my foreign language. Because my major requires 4 semesters, italian 5 is above that so i can by pass it. Lets hope i dont have to take it!

So ive been running around like a chicken wth no head. Today in anthro class i was so nervous that i physically got sick. I had to leave in the middle of class, couldnt find a bathroom anywhere, so i threw up in some bushes. Cute huh? Thank God no one was around.

I spoke with my parents. They encouraged me to stick it out. They said you bought so much supplies, the hassel of traveling, the tuition..etc. just finish out this semester and if it doenst change come back. I guess its only been a week, so with time, it will hopefully get better. Its hard because there reallky isnt anyone my age. I know its only 2 yr difference, but they all seem pretty immature. I dont want to go to the "college bar" that all the youngings go to.

My studies are pretty intense. My schedule is as follows :

Monday
Anthro 9:05-10am
Italian (Tentative) 11:15-12:40
Biology 12:50-1:45
Math 2:55-4:20

Tues
Pyschology (which is my minor) 11:10-12:35
English 4:30-5:55

Wednesday
Anthro 9:05-10
Bio 12:50-1:45
Math 2:55-4:20

Thursday
Pysch 11:10-12:35
Bio Lab 12:45-2:45
English 4:30-5:55

Friday
Anthro 9:05-10
Italian (tentative) 11:15-12:40

-so the italian might be taken away.. but yea.. pretty long days. Esp when i have these 2 hr breaks in btwn. That sucks!!

[Gripster]

Hang in there Bella. Moving is never easy. You will always miss your family. Why not get a webcam and stay in touch with them if you can. It's amazing how much better you can connect when you can see people's faces as well as hearing their voice.

It will take time to settle, find friends and get into a routine and appreciate the things around you instead of the things and people you miss.

I'm pretty well qualified to talk about this. I grew up in England and then moved to NJ in 1999. After living there for 6 years, I moved out here to Cali in 2004.

My final piece of advice is to not come home too soon after moving. Stay out there until at least Thanksgiving or Christmas before traveling home. Coming home too soon just exacerbates the homesickness because you won't look forward to going back to the East Coast. (Trust me after a while, the prospect of more than a few days at home will drive you nuts!)

[gohawks23]

Originally Posted by BellasBmw

Thanks guys.

Well i have good and bad days. Its almost like a breakup. Sometimes i think "im fine. I dont need him/her. I can do this on my own." And other days, you wanna crawl back into their arms and never let go.

This morning was rough. Especially since im getting the run around here at school. Everytime i have to switch something around, i have to talk to 5 different people to get there. For example- I need an Eng 2 class in order to continue with my major. If i do not complete this class, basically next sem im screwed because its a prerequisite. However, the eng 2 classes are totally full. Well AFTER bullshit and running around i was able to get a tues and thurs 4:30-5:55pm class. Its a shitty ass time because i have like a 3 hr break inbtwn. But i guess i have to sacrifice.

Also, im enrolled in Italian 3. My advisor placed me in that class due to the fact that ive taken italian 1 and 2 at my CC in san diego. Well, today in class my teacher noticed that i was doing well and asked if i took the placement .I told her i wastn aware of a placement?? So i went to the lab took the test and scored high enough to be in Level 5. Well AFTERWARDS i find out that if you have college credits on a foreign language, you DONT take the test. So now the school wont give me credit for italian 3 since i placed well above it. Now i have to talk to the department head and hope they will eliminate my foreign language. Because my major requires 4 semesters, italian 5 is above that so i can by pass it. Lets hope i dont have to take it!

So ive been running around like a chicken wth no head. Today in anthro class i was so nervous that i physically got sick. I had to leave in the middle of class, couldnt find a bathroom anywhere, so i threw up in some bushes. Cute huh? Thank God no one was around.

I spoke with my parents. They encouraged me to stick it out. They said you bought so much supplies, the hassel of traveling, the tuition..etc. just finish out this semester and if it doenst change come back. I guess its only been a week, so with time, it will hopefully get better. Its hard because there reallky isnt anyone my age. I know its only 2 yr difference, but they all seem pretty immature. I dont want to go to the "college bar" that all the youngings go to.

My studies are pretty intense. My schedule is as follows :

Monday
Anthro 9:05-10am
Italian (Tentative) 11:15-12:40
Biology 12:50-1:45
Math 2:55-4:20

Tues
Pyschology (which is my minor) 11:10-12:35
English 4:30-5:55

Wednesday
Anthro 9:05-10
Bio 12:50-1:45
Math 2:55-4:20

Thursday
Pysch 11:10-12:35
Bio Lab 12:45-2:45
English 4:30-5:55

Friday
Anthro 9:05-10
Italian (tentative) 11:15-12:40

-so the italian might be taken away.. but yea.. pretty long days. Esp when i have these 2 hr breaks in btwn. That sucks!!

Use those 2 hours breaks to brush up your class notes, to study and do homework...then your nights are free! Doesn't the campus have WiFi? You can surf the net too...

Do you still like your roomie? Hit a few places with her...join intramural sports...get involved at aerobics programs at the Co-Rec...smile and say hi and ask where your fellow classmates are from...c'mon...it really doesn't get any better than college!

[John]

a lot of people go through this phase bella. i sorta did my freshman year when i went away from home for a long time for the first time in my life. i know some people at my school who come from different countries who have trouble adjusting, but they finally come around.

in time it'll be good, and you will adjust. in weeks you'll find your crew of friends and know all the fun places to hang out. i GUARANTEE you it'll get better. just stick with it, and try to relax and have fun. college isn't as serious as you think don't stress yourself out so much!

we're all here for you. feel free to post when you need help/ need to vent/ or even just lonely!

[ver.e90]

Hey, Bella. I can totally sympathize with you. I was born in ny, went to NYU, then decided to uplift my life and go to dental school at Temple Univ. in Philadelphia. Let me tell you- yes, granted I could easily drive up I-95 and get to ny in 2 hours, I was really feeling homesick to a point where I was thinking about transfering to NYU/Columbia for the coming spring semester.

After about a month, I started hanging out with my classmates, and I was thinking "hmm, this is NOT so bad after all". Then my desires of moving back to ny started dwindling away.

By the end of my senior year, I was actually dreading going back to ny, leaving all the friends I had made in Phila. Of course, I'm now back in ny, but I have fond memories of being in Phila.

College is truly the most ideal time to leave home and "try out" another city that you always wanted to experience without having too much to lose. Once you're married and have a job, it will be quite challenging to try out a new city. So, just try to make the most of this excursion and, who knows, you may even end up loving it here in ny. Your family and friends are always there to support you and you also have us at e90 to vent out your frustrations/celebrate your new found love for ny...

Hang in there- it'll get better...

[BellasBmw]

I know its only been a week, so im not too stressed on the fact that i havent gone out to party yet. My suitemate brooke has been 21 for 2 months so she is intent on going out every chance she gets. Whereas, ive been 21 for almost 2 years, i dont really get that high anymore when it comes to going out to clubs. I mean i do enjoy it but right now i have alot on my plate when it comes to classes. So i kinda feel like im a nerd or something, but thank God my roommate is like me. Shes 20, so she is limited, however, we get invited to parties off campus but we dont go unless we have nothing to do and would be worth it. But in my case, everyone is so young that it doesnt appeal to me. I dont wanna hang out wiht 19 yr old boys. I date guys who are 24+. So, i dont have that desire.

Today one of my Ra's came by and we all went to play soccer. If i get involved and stay busy i wont think about it as much. So, ill have to see what clubs the school offers. Tomorrwo ill be in the city. Prob about 2ish. This guy i met at school works on movie sets, so hes gettin me and my roommate in to watch some fliming of a new movie with the actor from harold and kumar. ?

[flush01]

i can't imagine what you will think when snow hits... btw, is it raining like crazy in ny ? caz it is in t.o. and ny not too far away

[Richypc]

Originally Posted by BellasBmw

I know its only been a week, so im not too stressed on the fact that i havent gone out to party yet. My suitemate brooke has been 21 for 2 months so she is intent on going out every chance she gets. Whereas, ive been 21 for almost 2 years, i dont really get that high anymore when it comes to going out to clubs. I mean i do enjoy it but right now i have alot on my plate when it comes to classes. So i kinda feel like im a nerd or something, but thank God my roommate is like me. Shes 20, so she is limited, however, we get invited to parties off campus but we dont go unless we have nothing to do and would be worth it. But in my case, everyone is so young that it doesnt appeal to me. I dont wanna hang out wiht 19 yr old boys. I date guys who are 24+. So, i dont have that desire.

Today one of my Ra's came by and we all went to play soccer. If i get involved and stay busy i wont think about it as much. So, ill have to see what clubs the school offers. Tomorrwo ill be in the city. Prob about 2ish. This guy i met at school works on movie sets, so hes gettin me and my roommate in to watch some fliming of a new movie with the actor from harold and kumar. ?

You'll hook up eventually, most likey away from campus since near campus, the bars will be made up of a lot of students, the same ones you don't want to hang with. Cant blame you on the age preference. I feel the same way when I bump into a girl at school who looks like she just finished high school. I wouldn't want to be caught with them, I'm afraid they will embarrass me, since a lot of them still act immature. Some of them, I have found out to my suprise, can be pretty aggressive lol

[scottz5]

Now she is close to me!

[sruzgar]

I too have felt your pain I moved to Florida nealry six years ago from SCOTLAND, not even in eth same country as my parents or friends that I grew up with!

The day after I got here I wanted to go home, I called my parents crying and they told me they would suport me in whatever I wanted to do but if it was them they would not come home. You have to give it time even though its hard!

I miss my parents and friends every day but I see them once or twice a year and can call them whenever.

I think its character building to move away and experience different cities and even countries. I know peoplw that would not move out of the same county but you dont get to see much of the world that way!

Hang in there!!!!

[Jay_328]

Originally Posted by scottz5

Now she is close to me!

go pick her up Scott, take her out on the town for a good time

[BellasBmw]

Originally Posted by Jay_325Ci

go pick her up Scott, take her out on the town for a good time

[Jay_328]

Originally Posted by BellasBmw

just a thought

[Curt3s]

I throw up when I get nervous too.

After my last breakup, whenever I would think of my ex and the new asshole she was going out with (druggie), I would get physically sick.

It was bad.

Hang in there Bella. College can suck, but theres alot of pros too.

[scottz5]

Originally Posted by Jay_325Ci

just a thought

maybe if she ever has time!

i am going to get a lot of crap over this!

[Brunotheboxer]

sorry but i didn't read the whole thread (i'm very lazy) but you should try to stay at least one semester then you can transfer to a new school closer to home. you wouldn't be the first to do this. i know exactly how you feel because i am very close to my family also. i work for my father and see him every day and am very happy to be living close to all my familia. good luck

[MrSilver]

Hey Bella,

What have you been doing since you finished high school if you are a Freshman and are 23?

[NaTuReB0Y]

Originally Posted by MrSilver

Hey Bella,

What have you been doing since you finished high school if you are a Freshman and are 23?

she's a late bloomer.........

[Greeney]

Bella, welcome to NY. Oh and the Guido thing is almost isolated to LI. We are working on that issue .