[Joekerr]

Originally Posted by Lups

Now that you mention it, I do remember recommending certain blenders to her to use when she disposes your body...

Men are by nature so damn annoying where as us women are always perfect. Me especially. Never been stubborn, never been wrong, I've never fucked up...

If you need tops with the dog, I might have some. I have the next few weeks off cuz hubby bought a revenge dog (a dalmatian) cuz I put off buying a car for five years and I have a ton of extra energy cuz I haven't blown up or dug up any part of the house in a year thanks to covid and him and the kids being around all day long. I've naturally handled that too almost perfectly, there has been no huge rage fits or beating the poor bag I hung in the garage while blasting music for everyone to enjoy.

I'm also perfect with money, if you need tips on that. I just put my unused car fun to a pension plan which made the hubby extra happy because the estimations for it is only slightly less than what I've averaged to make profit over the years.

Oh, and let us not forget the flat I almost bought last week cuz I'm going nuts while looking at his bearded face all day, every day and I need power tools to survive this fucking virus.

Aaanyway... just let me know if you need tips on how to become even better at this marriage thing. I'm sure I can make the 10k lawyer fee feel like pennies in seconds.

Oh yeah, that's true - I did get her a Vitamix blender as her birthday and Christmas present combined...and nothing else. And despite your dire warnings to the contrary, my balls did not wind up in said gifted blender. She's a good sport.

In fairness, she once gave me a wooden knife block for our kitchen knives as a Christmas present, and I kind of looked at her crosseyed like, "why would I want this - you clearly bought this for yourself and gifted it to me"...its always somewhat interesting in our house.

Honestly though, I don't think our dog is much longer for this world which is going to be sad. I sort of have to start figuring out a plan for putting him down when the time comes. He completely tore the ACL in one leg, we have a brace for him to help him out a little / give him some support, but I think the other rear leg is starting to go. Some nights he won't even move to go outside to go to the washroom (but he does hold it through the night and he's usually ambulatory by morning, so its ok so far). If the other leg goes though, I can't have him in that kind of pain and unable to walk. Hopefully the other leg lasts a good long while though - he's only 8.

[Joekerr]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

Statistically, the average married couple has sex 3-4 times a month. I would probably end up in divorce over so little sex. I'm just being honest. I know there's a lot more to sustaining a relationship, but needs are needs, and I'm very sexual when I'm involved. If a woman can't provide a very reasonable 3-4 times a week (...especially if we live together), it's not worth it for me because I will end up frustrated and cranky.

I wish you the best. Its starts off that way, for sure. I can't say its bad, because its usually twice a week, but always on weekends.

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by Joekerr

I wish you the best. Its starts off that way, for sure. I can't say its bad, because its usually twice a week, but always on weekends.

Hey, you're above average.

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by Joekerr

:l

I wish you the best. Its starts off that way, for sure. I can't say its bad, because its usually twice a week, but always on weekends.

Dude...get rid of some of these!! People have been banned for this!!

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

Statistically, the average married couple has sex 3-4 times a month. I would probably end up in divorce over so little sex. I'm just being honest. I know there's a lot more to sustaining a relationship, but needs are needs, and I'm very sexual when I'm involved. If a woman can't provide a very reasonable 3-4 times a week (...especially if we live together), it's not worth it for me because I will end up frustrated and cranky.

What cures sexual hyperactivity in women?

Wedding cake.

I'll show myself out now.

[MKSixer]

And now for the official word on sex frequency from your friendly neighborhood Viagra Salesman (Ret):

There is a reason that non-daily PDE-5 inhibitors are packaged in 6 packs...that is the monthly frequency of sex for the average married couple in the USA.

And as Sedan_Clan stated, a few times a week isn't enough, imho. I typically date younger women and I still think I'm a teen-ager.

[upstatedoc]

Just picked up my six pack. 10 bucks.

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Just picked up my six pack. 10 bucks.

There is even clinical evidence that it works in women. Not a recommendation but just a point of information.

[4Hockey4]

I dunno, we are in early 50's and rolling twice a week. I agree with the esp. first married and kids. Couple times a month you are lucky, and thats from your perspective too !! FT job, sports, own hobbies and 2 kids running around ?

Back rubs better call !!

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by MKSixer

There is even clinical evidence that it works in women. Not a recommendation but just a point of information.

Absolutely works in women.

[Sedan_Clan]

Somebody is trying to charm my pants off. How dare her!!!!

[nick46]

Originally Posted by MKSixer

What cures sexual hyperactivity in women?

Wedding cake.

Absolutely 100% true.

[dinonz]

Originally Posted by MKSixer

There is even clinical evidence that it works in women. Not a recommendation but just a point of information.

Women take Niagra. Makes 'em wetter than ever

[nyalpine90]

[Sara]

Meanwhile in Louisiana....

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by Sara

Mean while in Louisiana....

[Tommy-G]

So when my wife and I got together I knew she wasn't as much of a sexual deviant as I was and I accepted that BUT do I just slip Viagra into her water or do I need to put it in one of those pill pocket things.

[Sara]

Originally Posted by TommyG-inFlaNow

So when my wife and I got together I knew she wasn't as much of a sexual deviant as I was and I accepted that BUT do I just slip Viagra into her water or do I need to put it in one of those pill pocket things.

Have you tried upper leg and butt massage?

[Tommy-G]

Originally Posted by Sara

Have you tried upper leg and butt massage?

Yes, with and without pants on (mine)
True story though, my dog hates when we touch each other. I have to give him a treat to occupy him and put him in his crate. He is the biggest cock blocker on Earth

[dinonz]

Originally Posted by Sara

Well, I just arrived back from Mississippi. Date number 12 or whatever the count is now for those who have been following along.

Last Saturday (the 17th) I was feeling good and wanted to reach out to the Mississippi guy. I figured what's the worst that could happen? He either doesn't respond to my text or he does respond and tells me he's not interested anymore. Either way, I haven't spoken to him in months so what have I got to lose? Well, he responded and not only that, have you ever received a text message that makes you smile so much it hurts and you are so damn happy?

Fast forward to yesterday. Drove to his place in Mississippi. I got there first, he was having his airplane's annual inspection or whatever is it, so I made myself at home and waited for him to show up. Safe to say the dogs remembered me. When he arrived at the house it was like the scene from First Knight between Lancelot and Guinevere. I've never been happier. Sunburnt as all hell right now, but so so so happy.

Important things first - what type of plane?

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by Sara

Well, I just arrived back from Mississippi. Date number 12 or whatever the count is now for those who have been following along.

Last Saturday (the 17th) I was feeling good and wanted to reach out to the Mississippi guy. I figured what's the worst that could happen? He either doesn't respond to my text or he does respond and tells me he's not interested anymore. Either way, I haven't spoken to him in months so what have I got to lose? Well, he responded and not only that, have you ever received a text message that makes you smile so much it hurts and you are so damn happy?

Fast forward to yesterday. Drove to his place in Mississippi. I got there first, he was having his airplane's annual inspection or whatever is it, so I made myself at home and waited for him to show up. Safe to say the dogs remembered me. When he arrived at the house it was like the scene from First Knight between Lancelot and Guinevere. I've never been happier. Sunburnt as all hell right now, but so so so happy.

Looking Good!!!

[Sara]

Originally Posted by dinonz

Important things first - what type of plane?

A white one I have a picture of it. I'll post it tonight.