[bing240sx]

Originally Posted by fireline43

No desire to have kids here. I don't have one good example from my friends I can pick from. Either they have gotten divorced, financially struggling to the point they can't pay bills, or they talk about how miserable they are all the time. How can someone want kids when you see what it's doing to the people around you like that?

This is THE reason to do it... you've seen it done wrong so do it right. they've done you a favour in many ways.

It's like seeing other people's businesses go bankrupt and being too scared to start your own business as a result. Or... you take what you see others do wrong and you avoid those mistakes and succeed.

[ddk632]

Originally Posted by bing240sx

This is THE reason to do it... you've seen it done wrong so do it right. they've done you a favour in many ways.

It's like seeing other people's businesses go bankrupt and being too scared to start your own business as a result. Or... you take what you see others do wrong and you avoid those mistakes and succeed.

So ... when someone sees other people's lives suck for various reasons, and attributes it to them having kids, then that person should have kids to ... what, prove them wrong?

I agree that it's not a reason NOT to have kids ... but it certainly is not THE reason to have them! It would be, using your analogy, starting a business because someone else failed and you will show them!!! No, you start a business because you are passionate about something and/or are ambitious, and you think you can can make it.

It has nothing to do with other people.

...

There is only one reason to have kids.
Because you want kids.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by ddk632

So ... when someone sees other people's lives suck for various reasons, and attributes it to them having kids, then that person should have kids to ... what, prove them wrong?

I agree that it's not a reason NOT to have kids ... but it certainly is not THE reason to have them! It would be, using your analogy, starting a business because someone else failed and you will show them!!! No, you start a business because you are passionate about something and/or are ambitious, and you think you can can make it.

It has nothing to do with other people.

...

There is only one reason to have kids.
Because you want kids.

This is about as true as it gets. Outside influence being the reason to or not to have kids is silly.

Has anybody had any issues with conflicting ideas on how to raise your kids with your SO? Has it had an effect on the relationship or how the kids react to one parent over the other?

[Sara]

Can I post too? I have a daughter .... still on the inside though (She's 6 months gestation)

She makes her arrival this July I cant wait to see those cute fingers and little feet that keep using my uterus as a punching bag

Here she is.

[upstatedoc]

Congratulations OP, this has turned into an epic thread.

[Nkc]

Here are some pics I took yesterday of my 6 Mth Old boy Brandon. Testing out my new Sony a6000.





and of course a pic of the lady who made this happen. All natural 5'5 105lbs, even skinnier than before pregnancy while increasing her top load lol.

[kscarrol]

Beautiful pics folks!

To Nkc, don't get used to the "increased top load" as you put it. They usually go back to pre-pregnancy size once she stops breast feeding! My wife was really kind of pissed because she insists hers ended up smaller than they were before she she had the boys...

[KingOfJericho]

My wife only nursed for like 3 weeks and they grew probably a full size and stayed that way. YMMV

[Eat.Sleep.Race]

Originally Posted by KingOfJericho

My wife only nursed for like 3 weeks and they grew probably a full size and stayed that way. YMMV

[kscarrol]

^ Lucky you! My wife breast fed for almost six months with both boys... Doesn't really matter to me as she was never particularly well endowed up top anyway. I'm more of an a$$ and legs guy so the size up top is secondary to me. But if she's got it, enjoy it!

[sanf]

I see 2 things:

-the ppl who truly wants to have kids
-the ppl who's going by the book of life (dating > marriage > kids > grandkids etc)

I've to say i am 50/50. Obviously, there are pros/cons to all things. I'm 36 and have a 3 and 1.5 yr old. While I do miss the freedom we had without kids, it's certainly a joy having them running up to us every morning and giving us hugs etc.

The only thing I always tell my friends who are planning to have kids is that, there's no returning once you sign up. So make sure both ppl are at 100% before making the move.

[MrRoboto]

Only regret I have is not having kids earlier in life.

[ragingpanda]

I'm 30 and I don't have kids and don't plan on having any anytime soon. There is just so much for me to do right now with my life that I don't want to be tied down to an anchor like the rest of my friends have done with their SO's which almost always turns out for the worst when a kid is introduced into the equation. Of course they are going to tell me that they don't have regrets with their decision, but I laugh when they tell me they wish they could be doing what I'm doing with all the freedom that I have.

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by MrRoboto

Only regret I have is not having kids earlier in life.

Kind of this...

Having small children is a young man's game...

Our youngest was born right before I turned 45.

But I wouldn't be where I am today if I had married young and started a litter right away.

[JasonCSU]

Originally Posted by ragingpanda

I'm 30 and I don't have kids and don't plan on having any anytime soon. There is just so much for me to do right now with my life that I don't want to be tied down to an anchor like the rest of my friends have done with their SO's which almost always turns out for the worst when a kid is introduced into the equation. Of course they are going to tell me that they don't have regrets with their decision, but I laugh when they tell me they wish they could be doing what I'm doing with all the freedom that I have.

This is basically how I feel. According to some attitudes here though, I shouldn't have the motivation to get out of bed in the morning unless I have kids to take care of.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by JasonCSU

This is basically how I feel. According to some attitudes here though, I shouldn't have the motivation to get out of bed in the morning unless I have kids to take care of.

We truly are a terrible breed. Shame on you.

[ddk632]

It's true, I don't remember ever actually waking up, or eating, until I had kids. It was like a sad, vegetative state, all my life; then one day BAM kids were there. Where did they come from? Where's my toothbrush? I had all these questions, you know?

[Mr Tonka]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Kind of this...

Having small children is a young man's game...

Our youngest was born right before I turned 45.

But I wouldn't be where I am today if I had married young and started a litter right away.

Litter...

I worry about the age thing should we change our minds. But we agreed to adopt an 8 - 15 year old kid should we all of a sudden be overcome with the desire for a child.

Basically the older we become, the older of a child we'd adopt. At some point we may adopt a 30 year old or something. You you, to take care of us when we're old and all.

[kscarrol]

Originally Posted by Mr Tonka

Basically the older we become, the older of a child we'd adopt. At some point we may adopt a 30 year old or something. You you, to take care of us when we're old and all.

Damn, if I were a little younger you guys could adopt me and get to hang is with Mrs. Tonka!!!

[Sara]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Kind of this...

Having small children is a young man's game...

Our youngest was born right before I turned 45.

But I wouldn't be where I am today if I had married young and started a litter right away.

I disagree! My bf will be 44 this August and he has more energy than I do!

[///M3AN]

To all my friends that say "I don't want kids" my reply is I hope you still feel that way when you are 50.

[Boben5]

Originally Posted by Sara504

I disagree! My bf will be 44 this August and he has more energy than I do!

But you see the way you two did it, by having a child with a 44 year old that already had children with some other lovely lady, makes that a blended family with many different parts which in fact puts the children in a very stressful situation that they had no control over. In the long run will take a toll on them.