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      03-15-2008, 04:59 PM   #1
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Talking Confucius Says...

"Man who lose key to girlfriend's apartment get no new key"

"Man who fart in church must sit in own pew"

"Man who walk thru airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok"

"Passionate kiss like spider's web, soon lead to undoing of fly"

"Virginity like bubble, one prick all gone"

"Man who stand in front of car get tired."
"Man who stand behind car get exhausted."

"Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day"

"Foolish man give wife grand piano. Wise man give wife upright organ."

"Baseball is wrong, man with four balls cannot walk"

"Panties not best thing on earth, but next to best thing on earth"

"Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse"

"It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it"

"Man who drive like hell bound to get there"

"Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs"

"Man who masturbate into cash register soon come into money"

"Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time"

"Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam"

"Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night"

"Man who stand on toilet is high on pot"
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      03-15-2008, 05:01 PM   #2
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      03-15-2008, 05:31 PM   #3
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      03-15-2008, 05:57 PM   #4
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"Baseball is wrong, man with four balls cannot walk"

laughed pretty loud with that one
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      03-15-2008, 07:23 PM   #5
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      03-15-2008, 07:26 PM   #6
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"Man who bounce woman on bedspring this spring, have offspring next spring."

"A man with his hands in pockets feels foolish, but a man with holes in pockets feels nuts."
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      03-15-2008, 07:27 PM   #7
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      03-15-2008, 07:28 PM   #8
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"Boy fool with girl in wrong period get caught red handed."
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      03-15-2008, 07:29 PM   #9
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"He who eat too many prunes, sit on toilet many moons."
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      03-15-2008, 07:31 PM   #10
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"Man who masturbate only screwing self."

"Man who put cock on stove have hot rod."

"Man who read woman like book, prefer braille!"

"Man who sit on hot stove will rise again."

"Man who sit on tack get point!"
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      03-15-2008, 07:32 PM   #11
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"Man with hand in bush not necessarily trimming shrubs."

"Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts."
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      03-15-2008, 07:33 PM   #12
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Crowded elevator always smell different to midget.

Dumb man climb tree to get cherry, wise man spread limbs.
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      03-15-2008, 07:34 PM   #13
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Man trapped in brothel get jerked around.

Man's wife his better half, his mistress his better whole.
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      03-15-2008, 07:35 PM   #14
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Wise man never play leapfrog with unicorn.
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      03-15-2008, 07:36 PM   #15
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Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.

Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out.
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      03-15-2008, 07:39 PM   #16
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Man who snatch kisses when young, kisses snatches when old.
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      03-15-2008, 07:41 PM   #17
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Confucius say it take square ass to shit a brick.
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      03-15-2008, 07:43 PM   #18
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Two wrongs not make right, three lefts do.
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      03-15-2008, 07:46 PM   #19
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Confucius say... Fly who sit on toilet seat get pissed off.
Confucius say... He who pull out too fast leave rubber behind.
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      03-15-2008, 07:47 PM   #20
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      03-15-2008, 07:47 PM   #21
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Confucius say... Man piss in wind, wind piss back.

Confucius say... Man should learn to masturbate...come in handy!
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      03-15-2008, 07:52 PM   #22
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Man who behaves like an ass will be the butt of those who crack jokes.

Marriage is like game of poker. You start with pair and end with full house.
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