11-04-2008, 11:53 AM | #1 |
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This Morning's Encounter.
I woke up this morning, feeling much better than my previous days with the flu and lost voice, ready to battle yet another day with the mortgage markets.
I leave the house, turn the car on, and begin to drive to the train station. I make a left turn onto Flatbush Avenue (the equivalent of Jericho Turnpike on the island or Queens Boulevard, in Queens) to get onto the Belt Parkway, and notice a grey monstrosity in my rear view mirror about 3 inches away from my BMW badge. I wonder for a second why anyone would do something like this and make an executive decision to get away from this person, as I do not want to get rear ended and be late to the office. I accelerate. As I pull up to yet another red light, I notice the same grey vehicle violently swerving between cars only to make his way to pull up to the right of me. I look over to my right and recognize the biggest accomplishment in automobile engineering, a brand new Lexus LS460. Now I couldn't really make out what the driver looked like, as his middle aged face was hidden behind an oversized pair of "Prada" sunglasses. But I knew he was a Lexus enthusiast because of the Ralph Lauren Polo Shirt and a Lexus baseball cap; Classic douche bag attire. He looks over at me, then at my 335i, and gives me a thumbs down. I wonder for a couple of seconds what might cause an individual such anger and disbelief and roll down my window (highly doubtful that he could see through my tint). He yells: "Your car is a piece of s*it and overrated, this thing will leave you in my rearview mirror!". Now I'm not sure what it takes to get someone to this point in life, but I'm always down for a little fun. I look over at him, smirk, and turn the DTC (BMW's version of traction control) all the way off. He eagerly pushes down on his gas pedal and I hear the p*ssy whimper of his exhaust. Needless to say, I knew it was on. If you know Flatbush Avenue, by the area of Toys 'R' Us, you will know that there are virtually no pedestrians there and at 9:00AM the rush hour traffic usually already passes so there are barely any cars around. World safety - check. I switch into 1st gear, increase the RPM's to 3,000, and look over at my opponent. His eyes are incredibly concentrated on the road and seem to look pretty damn serious. The light turns green and I launch... Actually, let me rephrase that. I launched so f***ing hard that the back of my car veered right in a 35 degree angle, almost hitting the rear quarter panel of the LS460. I quickly accelerate to 60, 70, 80, 90. I miss my exit and look back. What do I see?? HIS headlights in MY rearview mirror. I pull up to the next red light and wait about 10 seconds for him to get there. I lower my window and honk my horn, no response. I proceed to do this 5 more times, as he is not paying attention to me at all. At this point I'm pissed! I want his acknowledgement, after all this was a fair race and he was pretty confident in his car... Nothing at all, he sat there with no reaction, didn't even look at me. I guess when you are that embarrassed, there’s really so much you can do. I put my car into first gear and positioned it diagonally in front of his. I got out and came over to his car... Now the only thing that came to mind was my good friend Steve's famous line, which I tried to scream as loud as I could into his open window: "DO THEY MAKE THESE FOR MEN????”." Have a good day guys! |
11-04-2008, 12:14 PM | #7 |
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11-04-2008, 12:57 PM | #8 |
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total douche bag
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11-04-2008, 01:07 PM | #10 |
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11-04-2008, 01:14 PM | #13 |
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jerk offs
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Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction. - Albert Einstein
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11-04-2008, 01:15 PM | #14 |
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great story man!!!
gave him the business.....what a douche that guy was.
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11-04-2008, 01:34 PM | #15 | |
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Quote:
I don't care what car you drive, if you're not at an event promoting your car/products you look like a douche driving with an emblem/badge hat
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11-04-2008, 01:45 PM | #16 |
Careful, I Bite.....
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11-04-2008, 01:46 PM | #17 |
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i don't instigate stoplight races but if someone incites me like that, GAME ON!
and i don't think Lexus makes ANYTHING that tops my E90 M3. an ISF may match its performance but not win over it. LS460? is he on crack?
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11-04-2008, 02:17 PM | #21 |
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at you of course...not with you.
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11-04-2008, 02:35 PM | #22 | |
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Quote:
Otherwise ...good story for those who get a big boner reading about this type of incidents |
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