[///d]

My girlfriend and I have been noticing it more and more lately, people using the term "my partner" instead of boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife. When I first starting hearing it years ago it was usually same sex couples, but now I hear it with just about all relationships.

What's the significance of saying my partner over the rest?

I'm old school, and if I was referred to as someone's partner I would be taken back and it wouldn't sit well with me. I know this isn't the reason and I mean no disrespect to anyone who uses the term, but to me it sounds like they don't want to commit to what it is. I'm genuinely curious so I can squash my ignorant understanding of it.

[///MPhatic]

I'm old-school as well, but I like the term "partner", as it denotes someone working with you through life, not just the girl on your arm. Partner seems to have a longevity to it as well, like she's here working with me to make this happen, not just the flavor of the month.

It's all personal perception though, true partners are married, yet you will not see "wife" changed to "partner."

[zx10guy]

What I'm going to say is probably going to piss off some people, but the term partner has come about with the whole woke movement and betatization of men. Why the term partner is being pushed is because of the narrative to make a man and a women totally equal and not recognizing there ARE differences in what each brings to a relationship. A man brings certain things into a relationship and a woman brings certain things into a relationship. Together those things should compliment. If you don't want to use the normal terms as boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, then I prefer to use couple or significant other.

[DETRoadster]

When my wife and I started dating back in 1999, she used the term for a short while. Her rational was that "girlfriend" sounded like a childish and immature title to be assigned to a professional woman with career and means of supporting herself. We were in fact "partners" in the relationship where we shared duties and expenses. It always sounded funny to me so I never used it. Apparently she stopped using it after I met a few acquaintances of hers, who were suprised becuase they were expecting me to be a woman, based on her talking about "her parner." That was 20+ years ago though, and "partner" really was mostly used by same sex couples. Today it's just more widely used to cover any and all situations, though I still am left wondering "oh, are you gay?"

[CTinline-six]

I'm a millennial, but I still think someone means their business partner whenever they refer to someone as "my partner".

[///MPhatic]

Originally Posted by zx10guy

Why the term partner is being pushed is because of the narrative to make a man and a women totally equal. A man brings certain things into a relationship and a woman brings certain things into a relationship. Together those things should compliment.

Exactly right. Complimentary, not equal in every way.

[Esteban]

I'm old fashioned, and I call my wife "my wife." I used to think partner meant a gay couple or a business partner, but I have caught up to modern times, like I always do, just a little slow getting there. Partner can mean a variety of things, as mentioned above, and I am okay with however a person wants to call their significant other. That's their choice.

[T0RM3NT]

Originally Posted by Esteban

I'm old fashioned, and I call my wife "my wife." I used to think partner meant a gay couple or a business partner, but I have caught up to modern times, like I always do, just a little slow getting there. Partner can mean a variety of things, as mentioned above, and I am okay with however a person wants to call their significant other. That's their choice.

I agree about it being their choice. However, if someone else call it something else, they shouldn't be frowned upon or chastised for it either, right? The level of respect has to be consistent both ways, right?

[Esteban]

Originally Posted by T0RM3NT

I agree about it being their choice. However, if someone else call it something else, they shouldn't be frowned upon or chastised for it either, right? The level of respect has to be consistent both ways, right?

Absolutely. "Their choice" means just that.

[infinitekidM2C]

My partner...

[David70]

Originally Posted by ///MPhatic

I'm old-school as well, but I like the term "partner", as it denotes someone working with you through life, not just the girl on your arm. Partner seems to have a longevity to it as well, like she's here working with me to make this happen, not just the flavor of the month.

It's all personal perception though, true partners are married, yet you will not see "wife" changed to "partner."

Agree on the first part, unlikely you go on a couple of dates with someone and call them your partner. It's a more serious commitment. I had lots of girlfriends where it was nothing more than me hanging out with a girl and friend, nothing serious, no commitment. I was fine with calling them "girl friend", would never have called them "partner".

I disagree on true partners needing to be married. I can do a project or business venture on a handshake (partners) without needing a contract. Depends on who and what we are talking about.

[///d]

I feel like saying "my partner" sounds less intimate. If I were to introduce my girlfriend as my partner I would get a stern look and asked "Your what?".

It's always caught me off guard when someone says my partner. I've never known if that meant it was just a mutual agreement on a status without commitment, or a temporary thing, or what it was.

[overcoil]

Originally Posted by zx10guy

What I'm going to say is probably going to piss off some people, but the term partner has come about with the whole woke movement and betatization of men. Why the term partner is being pushed is because of the narrative to make a man and a women totally equal and not recognizing there ARE differences in what each brings to a relationship. A man brings certain things into a relationship and a woman brings certain things into a relationship. Together those things should compliment. If you don't want to use the normal terms as boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, then I prefer to use couple or significant other.

I would counter and say that transferring from legalese 'domestic partner' / 'partner' evolved from conservative wealth (Herschel Walker) who attempt to keep their assets from the people they at one time were intimate with and are now out of favor.

[Donatello.]

I say my wife & my wife says my husband. Neither of us have a problem with those words/titles.

If you want to say partner, go for it.

[spazzyfry123]

Originally Posted by T0RM3NT

...The level of respect has to be consistent both ways, right?

Don't you know that isn't how it works nowadays?

[DocL]

I don't mind the term partner. A lot of my older patients use it as they are a widow and in a new relaionship. It seems out of place to use boyfriend/girlfriend when you are in your 70s, 80s, or yes, your 90s.

[vreihen16]

Fear of commitment, and/or fear of wedding cake.....

[heitzke]

There are specific instances where it is the "correct" terminology too. My partner identifies as non-binary so the gendered terms don't really fit in this case, so partner.

As far as it becoming more widespread, that's interesting and something I haven't really picked up on.

[RobotDoctor]

I am definitely traditional, old school but I actually don't an issue with the term "partner." I refer to my wife as "wife" and she refers to me as her "husband. "

There are other terms that drive me up the wall and that is more gender based but that is another story and another thread.

[Esteban]

Originally Posted by M2siast

Such big discussion and I’m here just thinking “partner” is a person who you live with but you didn’t marry. Can’t call your girlfriend who you live with and have 4 children with a girlfriend, but can’t call her your wife or spouse because you didn’t get married. Hence “partner”. Don’t think it’s any of the above.

There is "common law marriage," which is only recognized in a handful of states.

A common law marriage usually consists of a couple that considers themselves married and exhibit the typical characteristics associate with a marriage – cohabitation, joint finances and financial accounts, children, etc. However, they never went through an officiated ceremony or registered with the state of residence.

So that could be husband or wife, or partner if that is your choice.

[c1pher]

[shawnhayes]

Originally Posted by zx10guy

What I'm going to say is probably going to piss off some people, but the term partner has come about with the whole woke movement and betatization of men. Why the term partner is being pushed is because of the narrative to make a man and a women totally equal and not recognizing there ARE differences in what each brings to a relationship. A man brings certain things into a relationship and a woman brings certain things into a relationship. Together those things should compliment. If you don't want to use the normal terms as boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, then I prefer to use couple or significant other.

It doesn't piss me off at all, but I think this is a pretty sad characterization.

That being said, there are couples who CANNOT get legally married. At that point, "girlfriend" just doesn't cover it. If both are participating in the partnership and contributing (personally and financially), then "girlfriend" again isn't quite to par. This has NOTHING to do with political correctness. It has to do with respect.

But, to some extent, this has alighted some social realities. We have a significant number of people who don't respect other people's relationships and relationship choices. That's their problem, and I don't really care what they have to say - when you can't offer common respect to your fellow person, you don't deserve it either.

Shawn