[pdjafari]

So after 3-4 years of being bf/gf and getting engaged 3 weeks ago (in front of a huge party of 80 close friends/family members) and a wedding date of May 1 2009, she broke things off last week. Some drama between family, religion got thrown in and in the end stress/pressure caused her to buckle.

Wedding plans had almost all been finalized, 35k later I find that most of the $$ cannot be recovered as the venue and many many other things are non refundable beyond a certain date.

So to prevent myself from getting depressed I ordered the following things

M3 side skirts
M tech tri stitched steering wheel
RPi scoops
M tech Shift knob
JB3 PnP

The other items I'll be ordering soon are VRS type II rear diffuser, Bav diagnostic tool, Helix FMIC and some other goodies...

Weathers looking real good this weekend, so I cant wait to clean my DPE's and throw them on along with my VRS lip that I've had for 3 months just sitting/waiting to be installed...

I'm hoping to keep busy modding as I've been 'out of the game' so to speak after having to drop so much on wedding costs....

Hopefully, modding will temporarily keep me sane and busy

[Comet]

don't forget downpipes... u'll want that sexy sound

[Zephyr15]

If I were you, I wouldn't give up so easily with the "non-refundable" line of BS you're getting fed from the venue and your vendors. In fact, I'd threaten legal action immediately.

You said you got engaged 3 weeks ago and she called it off about 1 week ago. That means you JUST signed these contracts. Even if there was a near-immediate "date of no return" the venue and vendors have a duty to mitigate their damages and book other events to make up for your cancellation. It's also very unlikely that they are already out-of-pocket two months in advance of your wedding preparing to fulfill their end of the deal.

Don't roll over on this one. They have not (and will never) given you anything for your money and are not entitled to keep all of it. They may very well be due something because of opportunity costs, etc., but you should be fighting to get the majority of it back.

[Blake]

Originally Posted by Zephyr15

If I were you, I wouldn't give up so easily with the "non-refundable" line of BS you're getting fed from the venue and your vendors. In fact, I'd threaten legal action immediately.

You said you got engaged 3 weeks ago and she called it off about 1 week ago. That means you JUST signed these contracts. Even if there was a near-immediate "date of no return" the venue and vendors have a duty to mitigate their damages and book other events to make up for your cancellation. It's also very unlikely that they are already out-of-pocket two months in advance of your wedding preparing to fulfill their end of the deal.

Don't roll over on this one. They have not (and will never) given you anything for your money and are not entitled to keep all of it. They may very well be due something because of opportunity costs, etc., but you should be fighting to get the majority of it back.

+1...that's a lot of money to just say goodbye to....that's also a lot of mods that can't be had

[josephr25]

How much are you getting back? Maybe that money can be used towards a new car that you can drive by her house with.

[stimpy]

Originally Posted by Zephyr15

If I were you, I wouldn't give up so easily with the "non-refundable" line of BS you're getting fed from the venue and your vendors. In fact, I'd threaten legal action immediately.

You said you got engaged 3 weeks ago and she called it off about 1 week ago. That means you JUST signed these contracts. Even if there was a near-immediate "date of no return" the venue and vendors have a duty to mitigate their damages and book other events to make up for your cancellation. It's also very unlikely that they are already out-of-pocket two months in advance of your wedding preparing to fulfill their end of the deal.

Don't roll over on this one. They have not (and will never) given you anything for your money and are not entitled to keep all of it. They may very well be due something because of opportunity costs, etc., but you should be fighting to get the majority of it back.

+1 - FIGHT FOR MORE MOD MONEY!!!!
________
Volvo Modular engine picture
________
PETER COLLINS (RACING DRIVER)

[bolty]

Dude, shitty stuff and I feel for you

Drama with the significant other always sucks donkey balls.

Hope it works out. Go lean on some good friends. Keep yourself busy. Mod your car like a mofo.

Good luck.

[pdjafari]

^^The cost for the venue alone was 11k, of which 7500 was already paid. I sent an Email reqeusting a credit, however they are stipulating that the signed contract indicates that with only 60 days remaining, I'd be responsible for 75% of the cost, in other words they are keeping my $7500.....

Not to mention the 10k ring....cant take this custom ring back. Guess i'll hold onto it, maybe upgrade it for the next girl unless I end up like the 'old guy at the club'

The good news is I was able to recover $1500 for the chairs, along with 500 for the invitations b/c they had not yet been printed...

However it looks like I'm short $1500 on the deposit for the photographer, 7500 for the venue, 10k for the ring and another 2-3k on other deposits I placed....

[Blake]

[Zephyr15]

Originally Posted by pdjafari

^^The cost for the venue alone was 11k, of which 7500 was already paid. I sent an Email reqeusting a credit, however they are stipulating that the signed contract indicates that with only 60 days remaining, I'd be responsible for 75% of the cost, in other words they are keeping my $7500.....

Not to mention the 10k ring....cant take this custom ring back. Guess i'll hold onto it, maybe upgrade it for the next girl unless I end up like the 'old guy at the club'

1. Forget what the venue says the contract says. If you can, find a lawyer (litigator who deals with basic contract disputes - they are not uncommon - referrals are best) who will agree to look at it and give you an initial consultation for free. Every state has established law about contract disputes like this and the initial consultation should include a basic explanation of the applicable law and a rough assessment of where you stand.

2. There is absolutely a market for custom jewelery, or at least the stone. Start by going back to the jeweler you got it from and asking him/her if they deal with wholesalers. If not, find a wholesaler and see what they can get for it. If you have a nice stone people may buy it just for that and then toss the setting. Keeping for the next girl is crazy because there's no way she'll want something you gave someone else. Besides, you don't want to keep that thing around reminding you of the dumb broad you bought it for.

JEBUS! - $1,500 deposit for the photographer that he won't return? He hasn't lifted a finger (and wasn't going to for 2 more months) and he's walking away with not less than your JB3 and side skirts. Seriously...see #1 (insert "jackass photographer" for "venue").

[E92-Lighting]

Originally Posted by Zephyr15

If I were you, I wouldn't give up so easily with the "non-refundable" line of BS you're getting fed from the venue and your vendors. In fact, I'd threaten legal action immediately.

You said you got engaged 3 weeks ago and she called it off about 1 week ago. That means you JUST signed these contracts. Even if there was a near-immediate "date of no return" the venue and vendors have a duty to mitigate their damages and book other events to make up for your cancellation. It's also very unlikely that they are already out-of-pocket two months in advance of your wedding preparing to fulfill their end of the deal.

Don't roll over on this one. They have not (and will never) given you anything for your money and are not entitled to keep all of it. They may very well be due something because of opportunity costs, etc., but you should be fighting to get the majority of it back.

+999

[im spencer]

I side completely with Zephyr, you are entitled to your money although you may have acquired it through some impractical means. Don't give up every dollar counts, the more you get back the more you can mod and forget about your wedding woes. Shes just another skeleton in the closet my friend, I cannot believe she stiffed you after all this time.

[808six]

maybe she found a different guy

[josephr25]

I think I'll get that Porsche I always wanted instead of getting married...

[SoYank]

Originally Posted by 808six

maybe she found a different guy

Sell the ring to him.

[ZJP]

Originally Posted by Comet

don't forget downpipes... u'll want that sexy sound

+1

On another note, sorry to hear about the predicament you're in. It's always women causing the problems.

Keep your head up and have fun modding your BMW!

[im spencer]

I found it hilarious that this thread coincides with another thread that men are in fact better than women. Im a believer!!

[to_riffic]

fuck. i'm sorry to hear about ur losses...

[BillLee]

damn, i hope you'll find someone for you. you still got your car though

[synclastica_86]

I thought in the bride side pays for the wedding?

[pdjafari]

Originally Posted by synclastica_86

I thought in the bride side pays for the wedding?

not in persian culture

[krote345]

I was in a similar boat about 1.5 years ago. I had some cash saved up for an engagement ring. I was with my girlfriend at that time for about 5.5 years. Instead of getting her a ring, I decided that it was not an ideal relationship, broke up with her, and used some of the money as a down payment on my e90. A few months later, I met my current girlfriend and now have an upgraded car AND an upgraded girlfriend! Keep your head up man!