[c0nstant]

You approach the microphone, it's the moment you've been waiting for your whole life; singing "It's raining men" on stage at the Hollywood Bowl. As you make your way up, you feel a tingle in your trousers. OH GOD YOU'RE GETTING A BONER. All cameras and lights are focused on you. Thousands of people will be made aware of your oddly-timed erection unless you do something drastic.

[1] Flaunt your boner with pride and continue with your song.
[2] Lean over like the Hunchback of Notre Dame in attempts to hide it.
[3] Run off in tears, abandoning your life-long dream.




*(btw, i have no idea where this is going or how this ends. i'm just as in the dark as you)
**(first person to reply to each decision advances the story)
***(one 'advance' per person i.e. no in-a-row posts)

[m3pare]

1

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by josephbryan

1

"I have to do this". You tell yourself. Your entire life has been building up to this moment. You get up on stage, the fog machines turn on and you're shrouded by a cloud of gray smoke... the spotlights turn on and there you are. At first, no one says anything as you being your song. Then, almost instantly, people realize that you're rocking a full-on boner under your neon-pink spandex pants. "Boo's" start out quiet and gradually increase to a loud roar of disgusted, angry concert-goers.

[1] You apologize for your boner and run off stage.
[2] You pull down your pants and take a shit on the nearest person boo-ing.
[3] You continue singing.

[m3pare]

3

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by dark335i

why didnt u pick 2! lol

At first you're extremely disappointed this moment didn't turn out as you'd dreamed. Quickly that disappointment turns into anger and you pull down your pants to shit on some guy in the front row. You jump on his lap and lay a kilbasa-sized poop on his head. Next thing you know someone throws a bottle at your head and knocks you out. You wake up in jail, with poopy pants and an awful headache.

[1] You ask the guard if you can make your phonecall.
[2] You start singing the rest of "It's raining men".
[3] You try to get some rest and wait this ordeal through.

[silvergray545]

1

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by silvergray545

1

The guard allows you to make your call. He hands you the banana phone. Who do you call?

[1] Your best friend.
[2] Your 7th grade crush.
[3] Your pet giraffe.

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by dark335i

btw, jh are you actually making this up or are you taking it from a site?

we may never know

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by dark335i

2

*ring ring ring*
Her: "Hello?"
You: "Hey Katie... It's Megatron..."
Her: "Peter? Peter is that you?"
You: "Yes, I'm in jail and I need you to bail me out."
Her: "You're so fucking weird. I'm calling your mom, this is her problem."
You: "But I love yo-" *click*

While you wait for your mother, you prepare an excuse. You decide on:

[1] Telling her the truth, that you got a boner in front of thousands of people and then proceeded to poop on some guy.
[2] Lie and say you got roofied at a bar and was framed for a drive-by pooping.
[3] You decide not to say a word.

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by dark335i

3

can i answer? i dont know if this is "in a row" posting?

you have to wait :[

[m3pare]

2

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by josephbryan

2

Your mom arrives to bail you out. She doesn't say much, but she does ask you why in the hell you're in jail with poopy pants. You don't say a word. She gets you out and leaves you alone. After a very odd night you decide to:

[1] Walk home and figure wtf happened.
[2] Go to the nearest bar and get plastered.
[3] Pick a fight with the first bicyclist you see.

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by dark335i

3

You leave the police station and begin your long walk home when something comes over you. YOU WANNA BUST SOME HEADS. You begin pacing the streets in your stinky pants looking for anyone to fight. Off in the distance you see this bright green dot approaching. You decide you're going to attack whatever it is. The biker approaches and you:

[1] Tackle him off the bike.
[2] Jam a stick in his wheel spokes, sending him flying off.
[3] Throw a paper bag of peanut butter at him.

[quagmire]

2

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by quagmire

2

You jam a stick in his front wheel and he flies up and over the handlebars. However, instead of landing face-first into the concrete he lands gracefully on his feet. His eyes star daggers into you. He then proceeds to bust out nun-chucks made out of top ramen instant noodles. How do you combat him?

[1] Take off your grody pants and throw them at him.
[2] Make a gun out of your fingers while going "pew pew pew".
[3] Engage in a slap-fest.

[silvergray545]

2

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by silvergray545

2

WHAT THE FUCK? SOMEHOW YOUR FINGERS ACTUALLY START SHOOTING LASERS. THE OTHER GUY IS FREAKING THE FUCK OUT. TERRIFIED BY YOUR DISPLAY OF POWER HE RETREATS INTO THE POUCH OF A KANGAROO WHO HAPPENS TO BE HOPPING BY. HOW DO YOU CELEBRATE YOUR FLAWLESS VICTORY?

[1] BREAK DANCE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET TO GEORGE GERSHWINS RHAPSODY IN BLUE.
[2] EAT A MOUND OF HABANERO PEPPERS.
[3] BUST OUT IN THE BEE GEES GREATEST HITS.

[endofanera7]

[1] Break Dance In The Middle Of The Street To George Gershwins Rhapsody In Blue.

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by endofanera7

[1] Break Dance In The Middle Of The Street To George Gershwins Rhapsody In Blue.

Elated, you bust out your best moves to the classical tune. You draw a crowd of people and llamas. Eventually the song ends and you decide to head on home. On your way you realize your shoelaces are untied. What in the world do you do?

[1] Reach down and tie them.
[2] Leave them be and hope you don't trip.
[3] YOU LIE, I'M WEARING VELCRO SHOES.

[ben14142001]

3

[DBFIU]

thread win

[c0nstant]

Originally Posted by ben14142001

3

Ah yes, velcro--man's greatest achievement. Anyway, you continue on your way home when a meteor falls from the sky and nearly hits you. Whew, that was close. Unfortunately, it knocks over a billboard which lands on you and kills you.